Saturday, September 24, 2011

Megaman Xtreme 2

The first one was good, but this one's better.

You loved them when they were 16-bit, your fetish grew when they went 32-bit and now you can have them in your own perverted grease filled hands! Yes Mega man X and Zero are back in another low grade-high budget game boy adventure. Act now before your copy is used to feed starving children. But wait you want to know why you’ll need Mega man Xtreme 2 in your house? Ha ha ha, don’t be a nimrod, what you really should be asking is why you wouldn’t need Mega man Xtreme 2 in your house, the answer of course being there is no reason.

Some time after Mega man X3 reploids have started to malfunction and shut down, almost as if they have lost their souls. The Maverick hunters have traced the origin of this b grade plot twist to Laguz Island where the sexy witch bot Berkana and her willing lover Garreth cause trouble by unleashing Mavericks that X has already easily defeated. If Techno couldn’t do it in the last game of course two robots who look like they got stuck in an episode of King Arthur and the knights of justice will succeed in the same plan. Due to the fact that X and Zero read the script they know this all too well and set out with Zero’s honey bunny, Iris before her bust increase to stop the madness.

The game play is the same as later X games were you first pick trigger happy X or Zero master of swords and go on a madding quest to blow up stuff. Unlike most games the two hunters actually go to different places and fight completely different people, X wants to become strange bedfellows with Berkana while Zero needs to maintain his status as biggest jerk which can only happen if he breaks Garreth’s face in. Being a tad smarter then Techno B and G just don’t blatantly copy the stages from the SNES games but fortify them to make them different and harder with new twists and cheap enemies. Later on you can freely change between X and Zero at any time and in some places is actually required so you can even damage some enemies. Iris is a pretty lazy wench who sits around eating bon-bons until X and/or Zero force her to make deadly items out of souls they found in the dumpster behind Sears. Don’t under estimate these up grades though, they could be the only thing keeping your Hunters from becoming McDonalds food.

I was personally playing this on the GBA which of course requires you to be on the sun to make out even a pixel. But on this cartridge I could actually see what I was doing even in the darkest of roller discos! For a Game boy game the back rounds are probably the best I’ve ever seen. The pixels however look like they were ripped from the SNES games, deformed, then given a paint job so bad that it would make black striped prison clothes look like technicolor dream coats.

The music is recycled from the SNES games but it still has the same jamming quality it had back in the day. In fact once you hear it one too many times in super subwoofer mono surround sound you’ll be asking yourself, “What the hell? How did all those crappy pop bands and sell outs win more at the Billboard music awards!? This is total robbery!”.

Replay value is not only high but also mandatory, some of the stuff I said won’t even happen until you beat it at least 2 times. Don’t worry it won’t seem like a chore.

If you want the exact same old Mega man X feel in the palm of your hands make a pact with Satan for your copy of Mega man xtreme 2 today!

SYSTEM: Game Boy Color



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